Report of the activities held on April 17th, 2014 at KDM - Love and infatuation

Report of the activities held on April 17th, 2014 at KDM - Love and infatuation

Participants: 16 kids of the Yellow class

Unfortunately a few kids were sick, and others were on holidays, like

P, I and Da. U suggested to work again on love aftertwo weeks.

  

Trainers:

Sotar, Uli, Sara, Susanne, Nancy

 

What we needed:

Violin and guitar (Sara)

Feathers (we had 16) (Nancy)

Sponges (Nancy)

Toothbrushes (Nancy)

Translated questionnaire (Nancy)

 -----

 

Before the beginning of the session, U told us that Di has been Improving a lot his capacity to understand anger. She mentioned that yesterday he had been to his room and he had found his cabinet full of paints, and his clothes all dirty. He was so angry that he went to another room where he had found A (we didn’tunderstand if he had any responsibilities for what happened) and he had punched him.

A, had run crying towards U to tell her what happened. She had gone to Di, asking why he would punch A and he, apparently for the first time, had been able to say that he was very angry, and explain the reason for his anger.

When U had asked him to go to A to apologize for what he had done, Di accepted and went to his mate, apologizing and explaining why he was so angry.

U was very proud of him. (Susanne suggested toaward a compliment to kids who show improvements, to reinforce their learning process on emotional awareness)

 

1. Human knot:

It looked like the kids had fun during the exercise. There was a lot of laughing.

 

2.  Everybody is different in the way she/he looks:

Sara played music, when it stopped Nancy shouted:

- White shirts (all the kids who are not wearing a white shirt sat down)

- Long pants

- Short hair

- Girls

- Long hair

- Short pants

15 min

 

Sometimes the kids looked a bit confused regaring who had to go down, and who had to stand, but they seemed to enjoy the game. There were a lot of laughing.

Whenever someone misunderstood, they gave each other directions. There were a Lot of touching when kids passed each other.

S, T and F, Di and A moved following the rhythm of the music.

N and Al looked a bit bored, but Al still smiled.

 

(Games aimed to get awareness of our body)

 

3  - Touching/massaging ourselves

We sat in a circle and we touched our own hands.

Sotar guided the kids (while Susanne showed what to do) telling them to:

        •Touch the hands

•Squeeze

•Rub the hands

•Upside/inside

•Fingers massage one by one

•Tickle

•Caress first of the upper part and then the inside of the arm

10 min

 

Kids followed instructions well and they were interested.

 

 

- Becoming aware of how it feels to touch your own body/focus feelings:

- Debriefing, talking about the exercise

 

Question: How does it feel? (To massage, tickle, push)

10 min

 

•

M: gelih (ticklish)

•

De: panas (hands get hot when you rub them together)

•

T: lembut (soft feeling when caress the upper arm)

•

Di: geli (ticklish) and happy

•

T: doesn't like the rubbing

•

A: rubbing hands makes his head feel warm too

•

F: tired when pulling fingers

•

A: likes stroking arm, he can feel the hair on his skin

•

Fa: when he strokes, it feels like his mother is touching him

•

De: likes stroking

•

Di: when he strokes his arm, he feels like he's in the world

•

F: likes the strong massage

•

L: doesn't like stroking, feels like ants on her skin

•

N: likes the soft stroking and tickling

•

R: gelih when rubbing hands. It makes them warm

•

Di: doesn't like tickling, feels like poop on his arms

•

N: the rubbing makes her skin feels warm, she doesn't like it

•

A: feels sick when pressing his hands firmly together (Di and L feel likewise)

•

S: The stroking feels like animals on her skin

•

T: the massaging of her fingers is painful

•

R: geli (ticklish) when stroking

•

Al: massaging fingers is painful

•

M: painful when pressing and pulling fingers

 

Susanne: Touching your body can be nice or unpleasant sometimes. It depends where and how you touch.

 

 

4 – getting to know how to understand boundaries

 

The kids divide themselves in couples

It was interesting to observe that there were many "mixed" couples (boy and girl).

 

 

IMPORTANT: in every moment the one who gets the massage was allowed to say “STOP” without any explanation, and the other had to respect the decision.

They did the same exercise, touching the others’hands only.

They were free to talk, and share what they feltbetween them two.

10 min

 

Question: what do you feel when you touch someone, or when someone touches you?

 

•

R: likes to touch someone else, but doesn't really like it when someone touches him.

•

T: she likes to touch others. She doesn't like others to touch her

•

F: she likes to be touched by her friends

•

N: she likes when her friend touches her, it feels like massage. When she has to touch someone else, she feels 'pegal' (stiff)

•

S: she likes to be touched by her friend

•

A: He likes to touch the others, but he didn't like the finger pulling. He said stop to many kindswhile touching. He doesn't have any trouble tosay stop.

 

Same exercise, we gave them:

•

A feather

•

A sponge (one side soft, other side rough)

•

A toothbrush

 

They chose what to use on each other hands and forearms.

10 min

 

At the end of this exercise they were very relaxed!

 

 

There was a lot of giggling. They joked around with the feathers. Sometimes it seemed like kids had a competition to see who could last the longest whiletickling. Especially R and Al.

Overall, we heard all kids say when they either liked something or not.

Some kids, like Di, liked the rough sponge a lot. They said it felt like a massage.

 

They all participated well. Most of the kids didn't seem to have problems while someone else touches them.There were a lot of mixed couples.

 

Remark: if you don't like being touched by people, you have to be able to tell them to stop.

 

Uli asked kids what it is like: to touch, to be touched and with what

•

Di: Likes to be touched, with rough sponge. It feels like a massage. But when too rough on hisleg it feels like he sprained his leg

•

S likes to be touched by feathers, ticklish

•

T: likes to be touched with rough sponge. It feels like a salon scrub

•

A: Likes to be touched with rough sponge. It feels like bathing

•

N: likes to be touched with feathers, it makes her feel sleepy

•

M:  likes to be touched with toothbrush on his feet. Ticklish

•

L: likes to be touched with feathers, ticklish

•

F: likes to be touched on feet with rough sponge.Ticklish

•

Sy likes to be touched with rough sponge, feels like nice scratching

•

Al: likes to be touched with feather, ticklish

•

R likes to be touched on his face with feathers.

•

De: likes to be touched

 

5 – “Oh Susanna dance” in couples

5 min

They loved it. Great fun.

 

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SNACK

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6 – They sat in a circle

Music: Schubert, Ave Maria

5 min

 

This music has been written by a boy who was in love with a girl, for her.

Questions:

•

Do you know what it is to be in love with someone?

•

Have you ever been in love?

•

What people do, in general, when they are in love?

•

How do you feel about that?

10 min

 

Kids listened very quietly, especially A, which always seemed to become engrossed whenever he heard the music. M and F were giggling a bit.

 

Unfortunately the acoustic of the dining room is very bad, so the capacity to convey strong emotions is a bit reduced.

  

The questionnaires ("are you in love?") has been delivered and subsequently the kids were told:

-

Keep it for themselves

-

There is no right or wrong answer

-

If they didn’t want to do it they were free to leave it

5 min

 

Sharing of our experiences.

5 min

 

Question:

-

Who has ever had a crush on someone?

All raised their hands.

-

If you have a crush, what happens?



De: chat a lot with that person.



Sy: he agreed. He prefers to be alone with than person, doesn't want too many people around.



Fa: Curhat (shares feelings with his friends)



A: feels shy, plays with that person as usual



L: chats with that person. Smiles all the time



N: chats with friends, asks for help/advice

 

When you have a crush, what do you feel?

•

S: feels groggy and shy when close to that person

•

De: semangat (passionate)

•

R: likes to show off

•

A: Likes to be close to that person

 

*Kids were not shy to share what they feel. They were very eager to hear what the adults (Sara, Susanne, Nancy and especially Sotar and Uli) experienced and felt.

 

They filled in the test that aimed to predict if they had already fallen in love with someone

They could keep it secret, and for themselves.

 

It's peculiar how they were always very picky about what pencil to use. They checked with what their friends filled in.

 

Question:

•

Don't understand the question or trouble reading?

•

When do you say "No" to someone you really like?



T: when they always asked for money or things



In general: kids felt like "they want to take the stars out of the sky" for their crush

 

 

7. Musica Musica songs

5 min

 

General: The atmosphere was very good. Kids seemed to be more upbeat than the previous times and the group’s feeling was very strong.

They seemed to enjoy talking about the subject.

Fa didn't show much expression, except occasional smiles.

Sy, as always, smiled a lot.

 

We wonder about R's vision. This is the 2nd week he didn't wear his glasses. Uli said that they were lost.

•

How good is his vision?

•

Is it noticeable that he doesn't wear his glasses?

Bad vision can have an impact on behaviours and reactions on the environment and the interaction with other people.

•

Update: U said that someone donated glasses for R. He's waiting until they will be ready.

 

R behaved differently.  

We would like to add, that we feel that the group is growing in self confidence and becoming more compact. Maybe only Fa and M are still not inside the group...

 

Emoticons

•

F;

1. Gembira  (very happy)  

2. lelah (tired)

•

L:

1.senang (happy)  

2. gembira (very happy)

•

N:

1.marah (angry)  

2. lelah (tired)

•

M:

1. gembira (very happy)  

2. lelah (tired)

*(He signed both papers with 'chota bima', is that his nickname?) *I looked it up and I found: Chhota Bheem is an InDa children's animation series, focusing on the adventures of a 9 year old boy named Bheem in the fictional city of Dholakpur. Does he watch these series?

 

•

T:

1. lelah (tired)   

2. lelah (tired), sedih (sad), marah (angry)interesting to note her feelings...

We should understand why?

•

S:

1. lelah (tired)   

2. senang (happy)

•

Di

1. senang (happy)  

2. lelah (tired), gembira (very happy), sedhi (sad), marsh (angry), senang (happy)

•

De:

1. lelah (tired)   

2. gembira (very happy)

•

Fa:

1. senang (happy)  

2. malu (shy) *(he signed papers with 'LiterKerisna). I found out that "Little Krishna is the name of a cartoon character.

•

A:

1. gembira (very happy).  

2. Mall (shy)

•

R :

1. senang (happy)   

2. lelah (tired)

•

Al:

1.sedih (sad)   

2. sedih (sad)

•

Sy:

1. senang (happy)   

2. senang (happy) *(keeps signing with 'Entis')*

 

Nancy: “isn’t it often that Al is feeling sad?”

We have to imagine ways to give him responsibilities and more roles in the group maybe...

U told me during session 24/3 that Al had joined the "Frash" workshop.